I wasn’t planning on writing this, and it’s come as some surprise to me that I’m reaching out to people through my blog to express this.
We are living in very strange, and very difficult times. Some days I am absolutely high as a kite. I feel the waves of cosmic energy coming in. I feel blissed out. I have to lie down and surrender to the energies as I feel them elevating me and transforming my being. My soul laps it up - I’m like, this is what I’m here for! This is when I feel at home! Most often I feel this way when I’m doing very powerful lightwork, or aligning with my sense of purpose and mission.
And then there’s days like today. I just feel so very weary, sad and dejected. I’m tired. I’m tired in my bones. Mustering up the energy to do anything seems like climbing Everest. But worse than the tiredness is the depression. I’ve just had enough of this. I’ve really, really had enough of this world. I know intellectually that things are changing as fast as they can. And that positive change is happening. But on the days where I don’t feel it, jeez life is hard. I want to give a voice to that part of myself today. I feel sad, lonely, like I am giving everything I can and more and yet… it just doesn’t seem to be enough, does it?
At the core of it, I guess I am wondering why the Event hasn’t happened yet. Actually, I’m not wondering why it hasn’t happened - I get that it will happen at the optimal time, and those lightwarriors working tirelessly to lay the groundwork are going as fast and hard as they can to get everything ready. It’s more that I’m sad it hasn’t happened, and wondering how much more time and energy I can put into this world.
It’s hard because I am so done with the energy of 3D. I am absolutely done with it. It’s like getting dressed in the morning and trying to squeeze into my baby clothes. They don’t fit me any more. This is not who I am any more. And my partner and I find ourselves in a situation where we’re increasingly repelled by the limitation and restriction of this 3D prison, yet we’re also needing to plan our future so we can try and free ourselves more. Does that make sense? We need the finances to live a happy and healthy life, but at the moment to gain the finances we seem to need to continue to feed the 3D system with our energy and time. Maybe we just haven’t managed to take that leap into living a 5D life and earning enough to support us while maintaining our values. But I also feel that it’s not supposed to be this hard. The frustration I feel at seeing people who would rather bury their heads in the sand than wake up to the fact that child sex trafficking is synonymous with many of the world’s institutions - or that we’re on a prison planet and the spreading of cancer and disease through a gazillion avenues is a deliberate attempt to kill us off - I just want to grab people and shout ‘WAKE THE F* UP!!!’
Most days I’m actually really positive. I am. But today is just one of those days. I don’t like to be negative and moan. And something else is that I am definitely not somebody who moans and does nothing - I use this to spur me on and take even more action. That’s something that’s crucial. We need to feel the depths of this pain and frustration, as ignoring it just means it will fester. But then we pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off and reach even higher and bigger than we have before. My hope is that by sharing this I can open up a space for you to connect with your own heart, your own sorrow, and shine the light of your consciousness on it. That’s the key to transmuting the darkness into light.
What would be great, actually, is if you feel inclined, I’d love to hear what your advice is to yourself and the community for how to approach life these days. For those of us struggling like myself, please comment either on the blog or Facebook - what do you feel is the best way to approach day-to-day life?
With love and gratitude to you all <3
PS. I am holding a super awesome energy transmission webinar on the 22nd April. It is focused on the theme of First Contact. For details check the event page HERE.